Because God, that's why.

 

"God will not call the equipped, but rather equip those that He has called" -Unknown 

 

 

 

 

 

Well...With so many transitions around here, blogging has hit the back burner. But I am determined to stick with it. For journaling purposes, and as a resource as well.

 

Something happened yesterday, something that I had imagined but wasn't sure what it would look like. God knew. It was His work after all.

 

In the last 5 years, as I've watched my oldest son grow, and develop, and as we've jumped hurdles as a family, and moved past barriers, we have learned so much. Ethan was diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, and General Anxiety Disorder in October of 2013. We knew before the doctor's official "diagnosis", because we had been living with Ethan and had done research. We didn't need a label for him, really, but it was a good confirmation to have so that we could reach out and utilize resources for support and help.. Before that diagnosis?... We were lost. struggling. frustrated. exhausted. We had tried and failed many different types of discipline, teaching, rewards, parenting techniques, and still were left feeling so overwhelmed and a little hopeless honestly. He was quirky and tricky, and one day something would work, and the next day it would cause a major meltdown...he was like living with a ticking time bomb, and you never knew when an explosion would occur, or what would trigger it. We knew with school years looming that we had to make a decision. My heart has been to homeschool, and I kept Ethan home for preschool as a "trial" for that, but honestly it was a struggle. This boy is constantly on the go both physically and mentally, and it was nearly impossible for me to keep him engaged and stimulated and we were left in frustration. So what to do? Would he be successful in a classroom setting? Would it be overwhelming? Would he be able to control his hands and impulsive tendencies? Would the teacher be able to keep him engaged? How can we help him? Prepare him? You get the idea, many questions swirling..

 

To be real, I have gone through so many feelings and emotions as a mom.. Many that are normal just as a mom, learning the ways of mommyhood, juggling, multi-tasking, balancing. But some of the struggles were so trying, I found myself asking that horribly selfish question "why me?"... why was I chosen to be this boys' momma? why was I, the lazy, non structured, free spirited, selfish one, given a son who required all of me. My heart and my time and my effort. My tears and my attention. I struggled with frustration and anger on his behalf, watching him struggle.. "why cant he be normal?" "why does he have to be so sensitive?"  "why can most kids already use the potty, or ride their bikes?" ... may it be known that these questions, while real in the moment, are in their very essence destructive. Their source is Satan himself, and as we mom's sometimes strive to just get through the day, the last thing we need is comparison, or thoughts or feelings of insufficiency, along with constantly expecting more of our kids, and of ourselves as moms. But they swirled my mind, nonetheless.. "WHY GOD?"

 

Needless to say the answer is "Because God, that's why"...He CHOSE me. but it has been such a crazy process as God is working on my heart. Grasping this truth and taking it to heart. I am still learning, still being stretched, I am certain I will continue to as long as I am a mom {always}. But yesterday I got a bright glimpse into the "why me". Out of the blue, I got a call from a mom, someone I didnt know. My name and number were given to her as a potential resource. She has a 5 year old son. She's struggling. She suspects Autism/ADHD. On the phone she sounded drained. lost. exhausted. frustrated. concerned.

 

Thanks God, You knew didnt you? Just a year ago, I was sitting in her scary, frustrating shoes... I felt so weary of trying...Looking for answers, asking advice, picking people's brains. Let me be the first to say, we have not perfected parenting a child that has a few special needs and quirky tendencies, but boy, when you get to the point where you have a solid direction instead of feeling like you are drowning, you start seeing baby steps and progress, things start looking right up.

 

And now, having implemented several systems, gotten plugged in with the ESD, behavioral counseling, and finally started with Occupational Therapy I was actually able to say "I have some ideas!"

 

 

Woah. I told her upfront, I can throw some ideas her way, but of course every kid is different, but WOAH. She was asking me for ideas and I HAD some. A year ago, I would've just started crying along side her..."I hear ya sister, its hard!" I was so grateful that God had given me a chance to help someone. All the struggles and frustrations, the barriers ARENT for nothing. And best of all, to be able to be upfront and tell her "God made me Ethan's mom, and while I struggled with that, and struggle {still} with feeling sufficient, I am so grateful that God chose ME! And His Grace is sufficient enough for YOU too, and its not by chance that you are calling me now."

 

I feel like my heart is overflowing, blessed that God chose me to share, and to use His GRACE as an example. He knew. He did.

 

These crazy parents weren't equipped, but we have been called. My prayer is that as my kids grow, Ill continue to grow by faith. New stages and ages bring new challenges, but I am learning that I get to experience the very worst of my kids, and along with that the VERY BEST and I am grateful.

 

My advice to myself, and those that want it:  Simmer. Let God show you His ideas. They are usually so much cooler than we picture then in our finite brains. Then enjoy the blessing as it comes along.

Simmer..

Are you content where you are? Where God has you in your life? The here? The now?

I think many struggle with it... being content. Being "Ok" with where we are in our lives in the moment. I don't usually use blanket statements, but I sense that we (in our human sinful nature) all dislike the word "wait"..  many people struggle with waiting and I personally have a history of being in the habit of waiting for the day to get over, so we can start the next...

A large part of intentional living is focusing on where you are now.. being present in the moment. Prioritizing parts of my life and organizing my time, so that when I am working on house work, I can really focus on it, then when its time to read a book with my kids, I am not thinking about other responsibilities.. I am living RIGHT THEN.. in THAT moment. I am savoring it. I am appreciating it. I am taking notice.

 

Not rushing.

 But enjoying.

Listening to my kids.

 Touching their hair.

 Looking into their eyes, instead of at my cell phone..

Counting fingers and toes.

Answering their questions without impatience in my voice.

 

 

The question that goes through my mind is "If I am so impatiently rushing to get to later, or tomorrow.. what am I missing right now?"  A key ingredient in being successful at living intentionally is SLOWING DOWN. Slow down activities. Slow down responses. Slow down reactions. Slow down.

 

Note to self: Time to slow down. Simmer...

 

 

school days.. the big decision.

Its a little crazy to believe my oldest son will be 5 in May. Im trying to grapple with the fact that im nearly 1/3 of the way through his childhood. How does this happen?!



Seth and I have been discussing, praying about, and considering the different options for Ethan's education since he was born. We have always felt that public school was not the route we wanted to take with our kids, although we considered it for a time..

You see I was in public school until 3rd grade. I was pulled out because there was an abusive situation in our classroom (me included unfortunately)... and it was that situation, coupled with the fact that my very smart, ADHD brother was struggling in school, our parents decided that God was calling them to the homeschool road. From what I remember, and understand, my older brother was bored. He wasn't being challenged..  and as a result he was getting into trouble.

We took to homeschool pretty well, although I remember mom struggling to keep my brother on task, and I always struggled with math and often needed the aid of a math tutor. We changed curriculum often to try and find what fit best. Some of my favorite memories of being homeschooled are what brought me to even consider homeschooling my kids...Being able to get my schoolwork done in a few short hours, then having the rest of the day to do as I pleased. We lived on 5 acres and had a menagerie of animals. I took a special interest in horses, and got involved in 4-H. I spent so much time running in the woods, the field, playing by the creek looking for crawdads, building forts, and spending countless hours in my room reading piles and piles of books. We traveled with my parents, and we able to do that without concern about school schedules. Our school day was customized to fit our personalities and learning styles. We were also involved in a weekly co-op of other homeschool families to collaborate and teach more specialized classes... chemistry, Spanish, art, drama, speech, poetry, sewing... these are just a few that I remember. I have great memories of homeschool and some of the freedoms that came along with it, but there were some struggles too. As I got older, my mom and I didn't see eye to eye on a lot. As my studies got more advanced and required more one on one tutoring I lacked motivation. We fought constantly. In hindsight, I also wish that I had gotten involved in a team sport. There are friends that I know, that did a sport all through school, and they have built skills in that area along with lifelong friendships having that sport in common. I was involved in the horseback riding and competing, but I was expensive (although team sports often aren't cheap either).. and I eventually had to sell all 3 of my horses.

When I was a sophomore in homeschool, I summoned the courage to ask my parents if they would be willing to consider allowing me to enter a private school setting my junior year, (as opposed to public school)... after some thought they decided I was mature enough to handle it so we gave it a try. There were things about it I loved-- Band for instance. How fun! I played the percussion, rotating from snare drum, to bells, xylophone, triangle, cymbals, crash cymbal... we even went to 2 competitions.

So exciting for this homeschooled farm girl!...we had chapel once a week and got to do worship and Bible study. I also loved that the teachers genuinely cared.. They wanted to be there. They had a heart and passion to teach and for us to excel. And they were believers, which brought a nice umbrella of comfort when it came to conflict with other students, or struggles with homework or assignments. But there were difficulties there as well. For one, private school was SPENDY. I haven't had a chance to thank my parents for it, but I appreciate that they paid for me to go. It was also an hour drive, and while I carpooled with a friend, it was still 2 hours out of my day.

Which brings me to my {2nd} junior year... my parents and I agreed that attempting public school my final year of highschool might be ok considering I had adjusted so well to the private school setting. A lot of the curriculum I knew already, and in some ways it was boring for me. The only problem is that when I attempted to transfer into public school my Bible class credits did not transfer.. So I had a decision to make. Continue on the 1 hour drive, expensive school for 1 year, or 5 minute drive free school for 2.... I ended up choosing public school and actually redid my junior year. I had quite a bit of free periods because of the amount/type of credits I was lacking. I spent much of my time in the photography lab and pottery studio which is what ignited my passion for both.. most of the other classes were pretty lame to be honest. I learned little, and spent a lot of time watching students around me with bad attitudes and petty drama. But I can honestly say im glad I was able to experience this last schooling time. If not for it I would never have had the chance to do what some people would think to be silly. I would've never been to a homecoming football game. Never have been a prom princess... Never have learned to use a locker combination.. but most of all, never had the chance to learn about ceramics and photography. I use these skills still today and they are a big part of who I am.

Seth on the other hand.. he was in public school from start to finish. He graduated valedictorian from his class (show off ;)  ) But he doesn't feel like much of highschool really prepped him for the real world, or for college with the exception of one humanities class..

So we have all of these experiences to pull from, and one really big decision to make. But how do you decide for someone that isn't you?... How do you know what is best until you try?

So. This past year, I decided that I would homeschool Ethan instead of sending him to a public pre-school. I was determined to do it, and do it well, and even had hopes of enjoying it. I to, got him involved in a weekly co-op and he has been enjoying it. This last week as I shared, he wrote his name for the first time, and I cant begin to tell you how accomplished that made ME feel. Wow! He really is absorbing some of this stuff! But the downside, (there always seems to be one?)... We struggled, Ethan and I.. struggled to focus, struggled to stay on task, I struggled to keep my cool. I spend my whole day correcting, teaching, guiding, refereeing... and on TOP of that to add school, its just so much. To be honest I think he has begun to hate the sound of my voice (the hint I got was when he covered his ears and yelled "PLEASE STOP TALKING")

With all this being said, Seth and I have always just had a sense that our sweet Ethan guy would potentially get lost in a public school system. When he had his official Autism/ADHD diagnosis, it further confirmed our thoughts about that. I am certain that there are excellent schools, along with incredible teachers (ive experienced a few) that long to teach and see kids truly reach their potential. But we just feel like Ethan in particular would struggle in the larger, streamlined environment.

So writing off public school and homeschool doesn't leave a lot of options really... So I started looking into the local Christian private school. It wasn't around when I was in school, how handy would that have been? I spent some time there yesterday, meeting with the kindergarten teacher, observing the class, and also spent some time one on one with the administrator... What a great setup. Class sizes no larger than 16. Teachers who are Christ-followers, passionate and great at what they do... they have 1 child who is on the autism spectrum in kindergarten, so its not a new concept to the school. The teacher mentioned that if a child was having struggles, they were allowed some quiet time in the office, or even a nap if necessary...They recognize and accommodate the state IEP, which was a HUGE deal for me, incase Ethan needs one. They even said I could bring Ethan by to tag along and be a kindergartner for half a day, to see if he likes it. How awesome!

I know what you are thinking.. "Awesome! Sign him up!" Haha.. me too. I told Seth, wow, Ethan would LOVE this place. He loves people. He is not good at carrying a conversation, we are working on his social, and verbal skills, but he LOVES being around friends. This all seems way too good to be true. So we decided to pray about it more. We want to do what is best for Ethan obviously, but there is one more barrier to get past. Tuition.... WHY does private school have to be so spendy? We have applied for financial assistance through the school, and haven't yet heard back if we qualify, but unfortunately, even if we qualify, the most it would cover would be 40% of tuition... were still looking at several hundred dollars a month over our budget. Its just not in the piggy bank..And so we are praying for open doors. I am standing in faith that if God wants Ethan to be there, He will provide. I am so excited at the peace I have about this whole situation... God is so good, and if it doesn't work out, we will cross that bridge when it comes, if it comes...

meanwhile, back to working on letters, numbers, and manners. :)

What is Intentional Living anyway?

I think it looks a little differently for everyone..

 

For me, right now, it looks like a life that has purpose mostly in regards to my walk with God, and in raising my kids to know him and follow him too.

 

The Difficult:

*Refraining from screaming and yelling when I am upset.

*Cutting down on the time I spend on my cellphone, ESPECIALLY in front of the kids.

*Thinking before I speak, both with my kids and with my husband as well.

*Slowing down my day to try and balance my responsibilities with spending QUALITY and FOCUSED time with my kids. Not just flipping the pages of a book, but actually listening to them. Looking at them. Asking them questions and caring about the answers. Getting on the floor and doing what they want to do.

 

The Simple:

*gaining more time with my kids

*feeling free from some of the stress I have been putting on myself, by letting some of the housework wait, in trade for more time with the boys.

*watching my sweet little men respond in positive ways to the increase in quality time spent with them.

*the satisfaction of less time "wasted" as my kids grow and develop.

 

I feel God working in my heart, and softening my heart towards my boys. He has entrusted me with these blessings, and I want to make the most of my time with them. I feel like even typing these thoughts makes me more vulnerable to failing in these areas. I realize that many days wont be easy. My own selfish habits and nature fight against me. Some days I feel lazy. Too tired. Lacking in motivation. I would rather turn on a movie and let the movie watch my kids. Some days I want to run and hide, or put in earplugs... I dont want to deal with the arguing, the constant questioning, the thousands of messes, the whining, the screaming, the fighting, the discipline, the training, the guiding, teaching, molding... And maybe just maybe I will need a movie break some days, but I want to let go of living in survival mode, and really utilize my days. God called me to it, He can and will bring me through it.

 

I know God made it possible for me to quit my job last October. The first few months after Ethan's Autism/ADHD diagnosis, I was trying to get a handle on figuring out how to help him, at the same time I was attempting to find a groove, being new at staying at home full time with both kids. In hindsight I realize that I spent so much time and focus trying to make my house "perfect" and "functional" I started to lose Ethan in the process. He started acting up more. More tantrums, more meltdowns, more arguing, more anxiety. More struggle. Something had to change.

 

So here is to change. Here is to being intentional. To focusing on today, being present, and having fun...

 

 

 I am so excited that I captured this moment. After months of tracing, copying, and me telling him the letters, Ethan wrote him name all by himself without any prompting from me. This is a big deal!!!!

 

 

This is a penguin craft that the kids did at co-op. So cute! Ethan is learning how to sit in a class type setting, listen to instructions, play and interact with other kids.. some days he spends time under the table, or pouting in the corner. But we are there, once a week, and we are trying, and learning.

 

Luke has gotten into the busy, naughty 2-year old fun stage. He is into EVERYTHING. I ask him to stop something and he will do it with a naughty grin on his face. He likes to dig in my Tupperware and pots and pans.. I make it my personal goal to find things to keep him busy that are not a threat to his safety.

 

January in Oregon is not outside-play-weather. But we had a day of not rain, so we took advantage of it. I put 4 layers on Luke (no joke) and they had fun running and throwing balls around the driveway.

 

 Aside from Tupperware, Luke's other passion is water. My mom suggested throwing towels on the floor and letting him go to town.. I added some carrots and cucumbers to make it "soup" and he spent over an hour in watery bliss.

 I love to bake. This is something I can do for me, that the kids enjoy (duh)... I hope some day to teach my kids to bake, but right now, its a nightmare to have them in my kitchen. I hate mess.. kids in the kitchen ALWAYS mean a mess.. I am a work in progress...what can I say?

 

 

... speaking of kitchen nightmares..  this happened today. I took it as an opportunity to calmly further reinforce why I DONT allow the kids to take stuff off the kitchen counter. My first true test in living Intentionally.

 

 

I give pinterest full credit for this idea. The boys LOVE it.

Pipes, suction cups, and plastic epoxy glue = hours of bathtub water fun.



Domestic Engineer

Have you heard? I got a promotion. I am officially a full-time stay at home Mom. Am I crazy?.... maybe a little. I find it interesting that being at home with the kids used to be common. It used to be the norm... expected even. "These days"... its actually quite difficult to be home full time and raise our children. Financial situations make it difficult and sometimes impossible for moms to be home all the time with their babes. I feel so incredibly grateful and blessed to finally have this opportunity to spend and invest in my kids!

Ethan and I officially started preschool at home this week. Why not start off my new career with a bang? Ethan wrote his name for the first time, and also started with scissors. I made a long list of goals, things that I would love for him to accomplish or learn before next fall. We will see how it goes. The list includes things like, learning to spell and write his name. Learning to use scissors. Learning to count to 20. Feeling comfortable with all the sounds of each letter, and beginning to sound out words. I hope to teach him about the calendar, months, and seasons. We have already started talking about coins, and learning about money. He really loves to learn new things, and I want to take advantage of this phase. I am excited and hope to just enjoy this year.

Luke is starting to use words and learning how to communicate without screaming or whining. Its a slow process, but he's getting there. He is sassy and is a little bit of trouble maker sometimes. He likes to hit his brother, and take his toys from his hands. He also has taken a special liking to electrical outlets and power cords much to my dismay. STINKER. His favorite words are "Ad-Dee" (daddy) and "no" which means "yes". He also says "Ah-Ah" which means "all done." He has a silly sense of humor singing his night-night lullaby in a fake opera voice. Silly boy.

As for me, I have been spending my evenings after the kids go to bed doing a lot of crochet. I started making these headbands and some people of facebook showed a little interest and I started selling them. now I make headbands all the time. Its fun and a good way to make a little "extra"... pretty cute, don't you think?

...then there are rough days...

We all have them. Mine look a little like this: I wake up to a kiddo screaming from a nightmare, or screaming because he wet the bed. I stumble in my sleepy stupor to their room to comfort them, stepping on a lego on my way. Arriving in tears to calm them and wipe up theirs, I soon discover that its not a nightmare, but a fully blown-out poopy diaper that upset the baby. And why wouldn't it? I would wake up screaming too if i woke up sitting in that mess.. Anyway, its a little silly, dealing with a blown out diaper, because you don't want to pick the baby up really, but you have to at SOME point as they stand there staring with tears running down their eyes.. And once you work up the gumption to pick him up, the next question is "where do I put you?" Anyway, I carry the sweet innocent pooper to the bathroom and sacrifice the floor rug while I run a bath. Trying to carefully undress the little fella I place him into the tub of water that I forgot to test and its just a TAD chilly, causing more screams... Meanwhile the other kiddo awakes and announces "I WANT WAFFLES! MOM MAKE ME SOME WAFFLES!"... wow. We really got off to a good start there.

Its so great, to write all that out, its almost FUNNY... admit it, you laughed a little. But in the moment I am battling to keep my cool, as my foot bleeds from the lego, my mind is screaming to run and escape. I am so not cut out for this. And yet, at the end of the day, we are all still alive somehow.

Let me change gears. We are gluten and dairy free in this home, and have been for 2 years now. Its fairly easy now that we've established this lifestyle. I bake a lot from scratch and it helps. And I plan meals ahead, and do all the shopping to be prepared. Because face it, when you are hungry, the last thing you want to do is try and plan out and cook an elaborate meal. Eating out at restaurants isn't always really gluten-free friendly. Which means that i have to plan carefully if I'm going to be out of the house for an extended period of time. I usually pack a suitcase full of snacks for the kids but sometimes... a bad day looks like this...

 

Yes indeed. That is full-of-gluten Pizza and Hot dog from Coscto. Doesn't look like such a bad day now does it?... (well we paid the price the next day)...

Well anyway, you get my point. I have good intentions and fully plan to bounce out of bed feeling refreshed, start my day right with quiet Bible time before the kids awake rosy cheeked and sunshiny, have breakfast prepared (while the dishes are running, and the laundry is rotated)... As we eat together, while reciting and learning our Bible verse for the day with the sun shining in the window, we plan the fun activities we will do together that day...These days don't ever happen. Would you believe that i really do daydream that pretty picture? We have awesome days, but I pressure myself way to much to have these shiny happy days.. It just isn't realistic. God is constantly working and chiseling at my heart..He is telling me to loosen up. Lighten up. Relax. But mostly, He is reminding me that my heart attitude is what is most important. If my kids are fed, bathed, hugged, and loved, they wont remember a shiny clean house so much, but they WILL remember if I responded to them kindly instead of sharply. They will remember if I was always smiling, or if I was always frowning in frustration. They will remember if I was relaxed enough to enjoy them, or too "pressed for time" and telling them constantly to "go play"...

My constant prayer for myself is that I can have bad days with grace. That I can cherish the happy grins as they eat the awful gluten-pizza.. That I can laugh in the moment with poop all over the bathtub, that I can be grateful for the washing machine to wash the sheets for the 4th time this week.. that my "bad" days would actually be great days with lots of extra grace.

Leftovers, they're what's for dinner.

 Ever feel like being a mom is like being completely destined to get stuck with leftovers?

 I was using "leftover" toilet paper today that had been re-rolled because L.J. had unrolled it down the hallway. I have leftovers on my clothes from L.J. wiping his peanut butter or banana hands on my pant leg. My hair is usually in the same ponytail leftover from yesterday. Who has time for a shower? Leftover makeup? You betcha. Slap some more mascara over that mess and call it good. Some nights, when the kids finally are asleep, after the 3rd nightmare, or puking for the 2nd time and I finish changing sheets again.. I get whatever sleep is leftover. If I am leaving the house, and pack a water bottle to take with me and my children get a hold of it, I have to also eat their leftover snack that they left in my water bottle... I usually end up eating whatever dinner is leftover, if I even have a moment to sit and take a bite. And its usually eaten while I am standing in the kitchen.. And yet, if there are only 2 cookies left and 2 kids, suddenly I am not hungry.

Being a Mommy is so much more than I ever expected it would be.

 {More of everything}
More Leftovers.
 More work.
More body fluids on the floor.
 More stress.
More messes.
More fatigue.
More worry.
More medical bills.
More food to cook and dirty dishes.
More challenges.
More selflessness.

Gosh. I sound pretty negative. I guess I am being real. There have been days where I wish I had been better prepared. That someone had sat me down, and told me the REAL stuff... that being a mom wasn't all giggles and tickles and snuggles. But then again, knowing these things wouldn't change my desire to be a Mom. Being a Mommy is more of all the great stuff too. And I saved it for last because its all of these blessings that make being a Mommy worth wading through all of the tough stuff. All those stinkin' leftovers.

 I find it interesting that most of these "positives" are actually God-given nuggets, made visible through grace when I choose to accept them. Look for them. As my friend Carley would say: "taking tough moments, and turning them to divine reminders of God's grace."  And the crazy thing is, I could type all day and try to explain it, But God already did that so much better than I ever could.

Romans 5:1-5 says 5 Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, ² through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. ³ Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴ perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵ And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

So on to the best part. The GOOD stuff. Being a Mommy is:
More being an example.
More compassion.
More love.
More hugs and kisses.
More appreciating the little things.
More activities.
More Learning.
More appreciating what we have.
More Laughter. (lets face it, kids are hilarious without even trying)
More fulfilling.
More blessing.
More selflessness.

Yeah I put that last one on both lists. There are a lot of days where denying myself and
 
giving and giving and giving

 until I feel completely drained emotionally, physically, mentally, is HARD. REALLY hard. Sometimes I just think "I'm too tired to be a mom today." Far too many times I have fantasized about getting in the car and just driving far away, anywhere, until I run out of gas. To escape the tough stuff. But God has called me to be a mom. And He has not only blessed me, but entrusted me with these 2 boys. And in doing so, He has called me to be selfless...by golly, some days I have a downright crummy attitude about it, but I am constantly praying for God to change my heart and make me more like Him.  And so in counting it as blessing, I am able to see the positive in being selfless. Without doubt, I am a work in progress.
That's obvious. And I am thankful that I actually LIKE leftovers.

 Get a load of my leftover hair and makeup!