Onward!

Well, here we are... we're just 10 days short of our 5th month here in the trailer. Today this chapter ends and it's on to the next.

Our old home officially sold about a month ago (PRAISE GOD!) It was a smooth sell, asking price offer, and they did write all my appliances in the offer...  washer, dryer, fridge. But it was ok. The house SOLD! (And if you need an incredible Real Estate Broker, I seriously have your gal)

We started right away searching for a new home to purchase, and quickly found that in our budget, location, and specs, there were VERY limited choices. VERY. As in... like 3. We looked at them all, and they all had very negative things going on. Moldy basements with exposed wiring. One with a master bedroom and master bathroom on opposite ends of the house (what?! who does that?) One had a nice chunk of land but it was out in no-cell service boondocks and 90% of the beautiful land was set on a steep rocky hill.. you get the idea. None were a plausible option really. So we have a few options, we could sit in trailer world for an undetermined amount of time, it could be a week, or a year, before the perfect place came along to snatch.. or we could do what I told Seth I would. never. ever. do.

So amazing how God works on stubborn hearts. Am I right?

We made the choice to pursue a piece of land and start the process of building our own dream home. And so here we are. We have our eyes (and our hearts) set on a piece of land. Its beautiful. Its perfect for us. (pictured below with the most incredible and gorgeous oak tree in the center) Annnnnd its got a ways to go. Completely raw land, in need of sewer/septic/well ect ect ect.

We new that we didn't want to weather the winter in the trailer. This aluminum sided buggy cools off and heats up as quickly as a tin can would. And with nights cooling to aprox 50-60 lately we already use the heater on  a regular basis. I couldn't imagine if it were in the freezing temps how that would go. Seth has had to haul this puppy to "dump" the black water every 8-12 days over the last 5 months, you can do the math. I don't blame him for needing a break from hitching, hauling, unhitching, leveling, resetting. ect. Its a pain. And would be worse in winter months, with ice, snow, ect... He has been incredibly patient and such a trooper. And now he is pro at this chore ;)..

What am I pro at? I am pro at keeping my fridge really cleaned out, with limited space. I am pro at putting ONLY safe toilet paper down the pot. I am pro at remembering to turn on the hot water at least 30 min BEFORE I need to shower or do dishes. I am pro at storage solutions.

I am semi-pro at sleeping in a moving vessel. Semi-pro at sharing my bedroom with 3 men and a dog. Semi pro with rotating through 5 basic outfits. Semi-pro and knowing where aprox 10% of my belongings are located. And I know I will have gained a passionate and deep appreciation for these things, when I gain these luxuries back.

With that, we began to search for a rental. For those of you that have looked, youll know, rental rates are THROUGH the roof. And some, (not all) companies are taking advantage of the fact that many people don't have decent credit to purchase, or the amount of homes for sale is so limited, many are forced to rent. Most of the rental houses we sifted through were nearly double our old mortgage payment and also required deposits, first and last month rent ect ect ect. What a mess. So we checked into apartments. In one town, a 2 bed 1 bath apt ran aprox $1100 a month. mind blowing! In another nearby town we found some cheaper but with a 3-5 month waiting list.. hmm.

So, we sat a little longer, waiting to see what God had planned. We decided to put in an application on the waiting list apartment, in the event we needed it 3-5 months later. Before we even got to that point to submit applications, I was at church mentioning our current situation and a friend mentioned a duplex (of a different mutual friend) and how she was planning to move, and SOON. I can say it "just so happens" that the landlord is also someone we know, but this is all God's hand. He knows what we need before we even ask for it. And he takes care of the little things too. With excess. He is so good! This duplex, turns out, was to be made available in aprox a month. I could do another month in a trailer.... What else.. would it work for our budget? It was just a little under our old mortgage, so YES. And you know whats amazing?  Washer, Dryer, Fridge, already there for us to use. AND they allowed sweet Pippin to come along. This little duplex has all hard floors, a full size shower, 2 whole kitchen sinks, doors, roof, walls, and a DISHWASHER. Praising God! Its the little things you know?  Coming in around 750 sq feet this baby is like a mansion. And the landlords? By far the biggest blessing. Kind and thoughtful and willing to help. We've moved 10 (now 11) times in our marriage, and they are by far the most amazing, and we are grateful!

Now we move. Tonight. And we hang out for about a year, and wait for God to move in the property if that's His will. I am at peace, and grateful for the opportunity and the change of heart to even pursue a new dream, and open a door that I had long-ago closed. So here's to new adventures!

Well goodbye summer!

If you are joining me here after I shut down my facebook, I welcome you! It has been 2 weeks officially since I deactivated it, and I can honestly say I dont miss it, AND I feel lighter and more free of brain space. Its mighty refreshing.

This summer has literally BLASTED past us. We as a family, (as you may know) started our summer adventure moving into our camping trailer over 2 months ago. This was to give us a good chance to prep our house to be listed for sale. We spent hours on cleaning, repairs, and updates/remodels, worked in 100 degree weather, learned how to (or not to) tile a backsplash and a brick fireplace, and overall just poured out our all on this place. We listed it for sale about 10 days ago and received our first offer yesterday. We were THRILLED to say the least. We accepted the terms and are now awaiting the inspections, and appraisal. Did you know that its now standard for most home buyers to request a radon test, along with a sewer scope? Fascinating. We are praying for smooth inspections and a quick transition.

Lets be real here (am I ever not?) I love trailer living. SO MANY have asked us how we are, while rubbing our arm with a sympathetic look... We are great! Trailer life is actually quite awesome. We have had bumps in the road (literally and metaphorically speaking) we have battled over the tiny storage space, I have organized, and reorganized several times over to find what we need and dont actually need, we have felt the walls closing in, and also experienced the joy of a more simplistic living style. I came up with this "you know you live in a trailer when: " segment for your enjoyment. I have had so many friends say "I WOULD LOVE to do what you are doing," or "I AM going to talk my hubby into selling everything and buying a tiny house."  This is for you, for those of you who need a little insight onto the day to day living in a tiny house.

You know you live in a trailer when:

1. You realize what a light sleeper you are, when your son rocks the whole house using the potty.

2. You become expert status in meal planning, because the real estate in your fridge is minimal. You may even find yourself foraging in your moms garden for dinner.

3. You learn very quickly that if you forget to turn on the water heater 30 minutes in advance, you can either forgo your shower that day (again) or wait ever so patiently for the water to heat.

4. You discover how amazing and quick propane heats on the stove.

5. You fold laundry the second it comes out of the dryer (score) because otherwise its blocking either the whole walkway, or the whole couch.

6. Your kids become rock-hard sleepers because they go to bed and if you still want to watch a movie, you are in the same room. Sleep my children. Sleep.

7. You text private conversations to your spouse because lets face it, there is no privacy in a tiny house.

8. You become a stock holder in command-brand hooks and hang nearly everything you own from a hook or a hanger.

9. You dont keep a single spare thread or piece of scrap paper. There is simply not enough room. That receipt you want to keep? Go put it in your car.

10. If it seems like you are wearing the same clothes every 2-4 days.... Its because you are.


Seriously though. Its not bad at all. We were able to hitch up and leave for the weekend a few weeks ago, spent some time with Hubby's sweet Auntie and Uncle, hit the beach for the afternoon, and I didnt have to pack a single thing. Talk about being prepared!

Summer is quickly winding down, and we are looking forward to where God will take us next. Ethan is starting 1st grade in just a few short weeks and Luke and I will be starting preschool together. Seth and I will begin shopping for what I am calling our "forever" home. One can hope right? ;)

Thanks for checking in. Our family is so blessed with such amazing family and friends, Feel free to leave a comment! We would love to hear from you! :D

Fun at Peter Iredale

 The kids and I built an air tram for their legos. lots of fun!

 The view from the master bed. My jewelry, spare change, socks, earplugs, hat, and everything else misc. storage.

Just a normal morning in the trailer.

Holmes Adventures Update : A New Chapter

I've gotten so many messages and questions about our current circumstances, I thought it was time to start blogging again.

We decided many months ago to list our house for sale. (We haven't quite yet).. There's several reasons why, but a big factor is that we just really desire some space for the kids to safely play.. with the house market being as it is, and our current financial situation,  we decided to embark on a special adventure to live in our RV trailer, parked on a family members' property, save and pay off debt, and wait for God's guidance in where and what to buy next.

We decided to move into the trailer sooner, rather than later for a few reasons. 1. We have several home updates that while in process make living in the home tricky with small kids (refinishing countertops, painting ect)... 2. Once the house is listed for sale, we can have the house set, clean, and staged, and won't have to constantly keep it spotless, and also won't have to pick up and leave anytime someone wants to view the house.

So. Here we are. Trailer living with 2 small kids. Some say we're nuts. Some say they wish they "could do that"... but regardless, we're in it for the long haul, and the duration of our trailer life could be a couple months or many longer. We don't know yet.

Meanwhile, my mission in life is to simplify, teach the kids the value of being grateful for the space and things we do have, practicing patience,  grace, flexibility, and have fun along the way.

We are well and healthy and happy, and excited to see where this new chapter takes the Holmes family! :D

Because God, that's why.

 

"God will not call the equipped, but rather equip those that He has called" -Unknown 

 

 

 

 

 

Well...With so many transitions around here, blogging has hit the back burner. But I am determined to stick with it. For journaling purposes, and as a resource as well.

 

Something happened yesterday, something that I had imagined but wasn't sure what it would look like. God knew. It was His work after all.

 

In the last 5 years, as I've watched my oldest son grow, and develop, and as we've jumped hurdles as a family, and moved past barriers, we have learned so much. Ethan was diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, and General Anxiety Disorder in October of 2013. We knew before the doctor's official "diagnosis", because we had been living with Ethan and had done research. We didn't need a label for him, really, but it was a good confirmation to have so that we could reach out and utilize resources for support and help.. Before that diagnosis?... We were lost. struggling. frustrated. exhausted. We had tried and failed many different types of discipline, teaching, rewards, parenting techniques, and still were left feeling so overwhelmed and a little hopeless honestly. He was quirky and tricky, and one day something would work, and the next day it would cause a major meltdown...he was like living with a ticking time bomb, and you never knew when an explosion would occur, or what would trigger it. We knew with school years looming that we had to make a decision. My heart has been to homeschool, and I kept Ethan home for preschool as a "trial" for that, but honestly it was a struggle. This boy is constantly on the go both physically and mentally, and it was nearly impossible for me to keep him engaged and stimulated and we were left in frustration. So what to do? Would he be successful in a classroom setting? Would it be overwhelming? Would he be able to control his hands and impulsive tendencies? Would the teacher be able to keep him engaged? How can we help him? Prepare him? You get the idea, many questions swirling..

 

To be real, I have gone through so many feelings and emotions as a mom.. Many that are normal just as a mom, learning the ways of mommyhood, juggling, multi-tasking, balancing. But some of the struggles were so trying, I found myself asking that horribly selfish question "why me?"... why was I chosen to be this boys' momma? why was I, the lazy, non structured, free spirited, selfish one, given a son who required all of me. My heart and my time and my effort. My tears and my attention. I struggled with frustration and anger on his behalf, watching him struggle.. "why cant he be normal?" "why does he have to be so sensitive?"  "why can most kids already use the potty, or ride their bikes?" ... may it be known that these questions, while real in the moment, are in their very essence destructive. Their source is Satan himself, and as we mom's sometimes strive to just get through the day, the last thing we need is comparison, or thoughts or feelings of insufficiency, along with constantly expecting more of our kids, and of ourselves as moms. But they swirled my mind, nonetheless.. "WHY GOD?"

 

Needless to say the answer is "Because God, that's why"...He CHOSE me. but it has been such a crazy process as God is working on my heart. Grasping this truth and taking it to heart. I am still learning, still being stretched, I am certain I will continue to as long as I am a mom {always}. But yesterday I got a bright glimpse into the "why me". Out of the blue, I got a call from a mom, someone I didnt know. My name and number were given to her as a potential resource. She has a 5 year old son. She's struggling. She suspects Autism/ADHD. On the phone she sounded drained. lost. exhausted. frustrated. concerned.

 

Thanks God, You knew didnt you? Just a year ago, I was sitting in her scary, frustrating shoes... I felt so weary of trying...Looking for answers, asking advice, picking people's brains. Let me be the first to say, we have not perfected parenting a child that has a few special needs and quirky tendencies, but boy, when you get to the point where you have a solid direction instead of feeling like you are drowning, you start seeing baby steps and progress, things start looking right up.

 

And now, having implemented several systems, gotten plugged in with the ESD, behavioral counseling, and finally started with Occupational Therapy I was actually able to say "I have some ideas!"

 

 

Woah. I told her upfront, I can throw some ideas her way, but of course every kid is different, but WOAH. She was asking me for ideas and I HAD some. A year ago, I would've just started crying along side her..."I hear ya sister, its hard!" I was so grateful that God had given me a chance to help someone. All the struggles and frustrations, the barriers ARENT for nothing. And best of all, to be able to be upfront and tell her "God made me Ethan's mom, and while I struggled with that, and struggle {still} with feeling sufficient, I am so grateful that God chose ME! And His Grace is sufficient enough for YOU too, and its not by chance that you are calling me now."

 

I feel like my heart is overflowing, blessed that God chose me to share, and to use His GRACE as an example. He knew. He did.

 

These crazy parents weren't equipped, but we have been called. My prayer is that as my kids grow, Ill continue to grow by faith. New stages and ages bring new challenges, but I am learning that I get to experience the very worst of my kids, and along with that the VERY BEST and I am grateful.

 

My advice to myself, and those that want it:  Simmer. Let God show you His ideas. They are usually so much cooler than we picture then in our finite brains. Then enjoy the blessing as it comes along.

school days.. the big decision.

Its a little crazy to believe my oldest son will be 5 in May. Im trying to grapple with the fact that im nearly 1/3 of the way through his childhood. How does this happen?!



Seth and I have been discussing, praying about, and considering the different options for Ethan's education since he was born. We have always felt that public school was not the route we wanted to take with our kids, although we considered it for a time..

You see I was in public school until 3rd grade. I was pulled out because there was an abusive situation in our classroom (me included unfortunately)... and it was that situation, coupled with the fact that my very smart, ADHD brother was struggling in school, our parents decided that God was calling them to the homeschool road. From what I remember, and understand, my older brother was bored. He wasn't being challenged..  and as a result he was getting into trouble.

We took to homeschool pretty well, although I remember mom struggling to keep my brother on task, and I always struggled with math and often needed the aid of a math tutor. We changed curriculum often to try and find what fit best. Some of my favorite memories of being homeschooled are what brought me to even consider homeschooling my kids...Being able to get my schoolwork done in a few short hours, then having the rest of the day to do as I pleased. We lived on 5 acres and had a menagerie of animals. I took a special interest in horses, and got involved in 4-H. I spent so much time running in the woods, the field, playing by the creek looking for crawdads, building forts, and spending countless hours in my room reading piles and piles of books. We traveled with my parents, and we able to do that without concern about school schedules. Our school day was customized to fit our personalities and learning styles. We were also involved in a weekly co-op of other homeschool families to collaborate and teach more specialized classes... chemistry, Spanish, art, drama, speech, poetry, sewing... these are just a few that I remember. I have great memories of homeschool and some of the freedoms that came along with it, but there were some struggles too. As I got older, my mom and I didn't see eye to eye on a lot. As my studies got more advanced and required more one on one tutoring I lacked motivation. We fought constantly. In hindsight, I also wish that I had gotten involved in a team sport. There are friends that I know, that did a sport all through school, and they have built skills in that area along with lifelong friendships having that sport in common. I was involved in the horseback riding and competing, but I was expensive (although team sports often aren't cheap either).. and I eventually had to sell all 3 of my horses.

When I was a sophomore in homeschool, I summoned the courage to ask my parents if they would be willing to consider allowing me to enter a private school setting my junior year, (as opposed to public school)... after some thought they decided I was mature enough to handle it so we gave it a try. There were things about it I loved-- Band for instance. How fun! I played the percussion, rotating from snare drum, to bells, xylophone, triangle, cymbals, crash cymbal... we even went to 2 competitions.

So exciting for this homeschooled farm girl!...we had chapel once a week and got to do worship and Bible study. I also loved that the teachers genuinely cared.. They wanted to be there. They had a heart and passion to teach and for us to excel. And they were believers, which brought a nice umbrella of comfort when it came to conflict with other students, or struggles with homework or assignments. But there were difficulties there as well. For one, private school was SPENDY. I haven't had a chance to thank my parents for it, but I appreciate that they paid for me to go. It was also an hour drive, and while I carpooled with a friend, it was still 2 hours out of my day.

Which brings me to my {2nd} junior year... my parents and I agreed that attempting public school my final year of highschool might be ok considering I had adjusted so well to the private school setting. A lot of the curriculum I knew already, and in some ways it was boring for me. The only problem is that when I attempted to transfer into public school my Bible class credits did not transfer.. So I had a decision to make. Continue on the 1 hour drive, expensive school for 1 year, or 5 minute drive free school for 2.... I ended up choosing public school and actually redid my junior year. I had quite a bit of free periods because of the amount/type of credits I was lacking. I spent much of my time in the photography lab and pottery studio which is what ignited my passion for both.. most of the other classes were pretty lame to be honest. I learned little, and spent a lot of time watching students around me with bad attitudes and petty drama. But I can honestly say im glad I was able to experience this last schooling time. If not for it I would never have had the chance to do what some people would think to be silly. I would've never been to a homecoming football game. Never have been a prom princess... Never have learned to use a locker combination.. but most of all, never had the chance to learn about ceramics and photography. I use these skills still today and they are a big part of who I am.

Seth on the other hand.. he was in public school from start to finish. He graduated valedictorian from his class (show off ;)  ) But he doesn't feel like much of highschool really prepped him for the real world, or for college with the exception of one humanities class..

So we have all of these experiences to pull from, and one really big decision to make. But how do you decide for someone that isn't you?... How do you know what is best until you try?

So. This past year, I decided that I would homeschool Ethan instead of sending him to a public pre-school. I was determined to do it, and do it well, and even had hopes of enjoying it. I to, got him involved in a weekly co-op and he has been enjoying it. This last week as I shared, he wrote his name for the first time, and I cant begin to tell you how accomplished that made ME feel. Wow! He really is absorbing some of this stuff! But the downside, (there always seems to be one?)... We struggled, Ethan and I.. struggled to focus, struggled to stay on task, I struggled to keep my cool. I spend my whole day correcting, teaching, guiding, refereeing... and on TOP of that to add school, its just so much. To be honest I think he has begun to hate the sound of my voice (the hint I got was when he covered his ears and yelled "PLEASE STOP TALKING")

With all this being said, Seth and I have always just had a sense that our sweet Ethan guy would potentially get lost in a public school system. When he had his official Autism/ADHD diagnosis, it further confirmed our thoughts about that. I am certain that there are excellent schools, along with incredible teachers (ive experienced a few) that long to teach and see kids truly reach their potential. But we just feel like Ethan in particular would struggle in the larger, streamlined environment.

So writing off public school and homeschool doesn't leave a lot of options really... So I started looking into the local Christian private school. It wasn't around when I was in school, how handy would that have been? I spent some time there yesterday, meeting with the kindergarten teacher, observing the class, and also spent some time one on one with the administrator... What a great setup. Class sizes no larger than 16. Teachers who are Christ-followers, passionate and great at what they do... they have 1 child who is on the autism spectrum in kindergarten, so its not a new concept to the school. The teacher mentioned that if a child was having struggles, they were allowed some quiet time in the office, or even a nap if necessary...They recognize and accommodate the state IEP, which was a HUGE deal for me, incase Ethan needs one. They even said I could bring Ethan by to tag along and be a kindergartner for half a day, to see if he likes it. How awesome!

I know what you are thinking.. "Awesome! Sign him up!" Haha.. me too. I told Seth, wow, Ethan would LOVE this place. He loves people. He is not good at carrying a conversation, we are working on his social, and verbal skills, but he LOVES being around friends. This all seems way too good to be true. So we decided to pray about it more. We want to do what is best for Ethan obviously, but there is one more barrier to get past. Tuition.... WHY does private school have to be so spendy? We have applied for financial assistance through the school, and haven't yet heard back if we qualify, but unfortunately, even if we qualify, the most it would cover would be 40% of tuition... were still looking at several hundred dollars a month over our budget. Its just not in the piggy bank..And so we are praying for open doors. I am standing in faith that if God wants Ethan to be there, He will provide. I am so excited at the peace I have about this whole situation... God is so good, and if it doesn't work out, we will cross that bridge when it comes, if it comes...

meanwhile, back to working on letters, numbers, and manners. :)

These boys...my ministry.

Ethan Seth. My Smarty pants. 

His name combined means "strong, firm, appointed one." His daddy and I had his name picked out before we even got married. Before he was even possible I dreamed about him. I always prayed that God would give me a little boy (He blessed me with TWO!) And that he would be just like his daddy... But I couldn't wait to see what creation God would bless me with. When I was 8 months pregnant with him I knew in my heart that he was a boy. Is that crazy? :}

 

 

 

This Dude. Luke Jonathan. My baby.

 
We deliberated over his name for months. Luke and Jonathan combined mean "God Gives Light"... I was going through a really traumatic and dark time in my life and in the middle of the darkness and awful, I found out I was carrying this guy. What an amazing blessing...beauty from ashes.

Everyone who knew we were pregnant with our second baby said "oh I hope you have a girl so that your family is "complete"... I always smiled and nodded but really I was hoping for another little boy. I wanted Ethan to have a brother. I wanted these brothers to grow up together. Get in trouble together. Fight like brothers. Be men together. God gave me my hearts wish (twice!). This little sweetie is cuddly and affectionate. He has his shy moments.



These are precious guys. I pray for them. I pray that they would come to know Christ at an early age. That they would be passionate and seek after Gods heart. That they would be comfortable with who they are as a men of God, and find their true identity in Christ. That they would find their niche in this world and be involved in ministry. That they would be a light. I pray that God will be preparing a wife for they someday. Girls who loves God first, who will inspire Ethan and Luke to seek God more passionately.. women who I could love as daughters. Sometimes I wonder if girls like that exist anymore..I pray that they would remain pure till marriage.  Call me a planner. But I don't think its too soon to pray for their future.

Raising boys in "our time" is difficult. We live in a society that revolves around self-indulgence, selfishness, instant gratification, and our country and our world needs strong Godly men that are assertive leaders. I have made them my personal mission. My ministry. In my home my prayer and my heart is to raise men of God. To be the mom that God has called me to be right now, means to show these mini-men how to be gentlemen. How to love Jesus. How to be kind to people. How to function in society. My boys are my ministry. What is yours?

Adoption Ponderings..

Some people already know that S and I have a heart to adopt a child (or more?!) some day.

We have 2 amazing boys by birth, but would really love to welcome another child from a different location. Its something we have talked and prayed about for years. It overwhelms and excites me at the same time..talk about an adventure! Lets add some monkeys to this crazy barrel!

{{don't these faces melt your heart?... I would love to hold and hug them all...}}

S and I are zealously and wholeheartedly AGAINST all forms of abortion. I heard it once said, that adoption is the ultimate form of pro-life support. And I believe that to be true. Adoption is supporting that mom who made a decision to keep instead of kill... It almost seems like one child wouldn't make much of a difference when there are SO MANY orphaned children.. but one DOES make a difference! I don't have any birth sisters, but I do have one brother who married a wonderful lady. She was adopted as a baby from Korea. Her story is truly incredible and inspiring, and I cant help but think how different and sad life would be without her in it...a whole legacy that wouldn't be the same..  I'm grateful for adoption that made it possible for me to have a sister!

There is so much that goes into planning an adoption we have only gotten to the point of discussing it.

research.

paperwork.

home studies.

applications.

passports.

fundraising. (adoption can be VERY expensive)

praying.

planning.

preparing.

waiting.

waiting.

waiting.

We are excited to see where God is planning for us to be in regards to our family. For the time being we are content as we are. And excitedly expectant. (and a little scared, lets be honest) Some people assume we are going to adopt a little girl to "complete" our family. But again, we don't really know what God wants. Patiently waiting to hear some clear direction.

Yes, my soul, find rest in God;
    my hope comes from him.
⁶ Truly he is my rock and my salvation;
    he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
⁷ My salvation and my honor depend on God^[a];
    he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
⁸ Trust in him at all times, you people;
    pour out your hearts to him,
    for God is our refuge.

{Psalm 62:5-8}

Meanwhile!

We have some friends that are knee-deep in their journey to bring 3 adorable little ones home from the DRC in Africa! They are holding an awesome raffle in order to raise funds to help with some of the financial burden. Here is the link. http://davidandheidifamily.blogspot.com/2013/04/congo-adoption-giveaway-raffle-1.html 

Check it will you? Show some support! Lets bring these babies home!!! :D